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Subang Jaya, Selangor, Malaysia
Currently 24. I enjoy editing videos. I've been broken, I've been bruised. But that won't stop me, from making my dreams come true. Say or do whatever you want about me 'cause I couldn't care less.

Sunday, 6 September 2015

My World Revolves Around You

      I'm not gonna lie to you. I miss you. Things are just not the same for me anymore.. I barely eat, I barely sleep. You're on my mind 24/7. I cry at night.. I stared into space for hours. It's like I'm slowly losing my mind.. And the fact that you're doing just fine without me, makes me feel utterly useless..

       I crave for your attention.. I crave for your morning and goodnight texts.. How you used to miss me.. And how much you loved me.. I know I'm not perfect, but I struggled day and day just to keep you satisfied.. To me you're perfect. I wouldn't change a thing about you, but I'd change everything about me just for you.. I wish you'd just see how much you mean to me..

        I mean we're perfect for each other.. Our families accepted one another. We have the same thoughts and way of thinking. We wanted to marry each other.. What happened to us... We cared about each other.. Why does this has to happen.. You were the only girl I see.. Only one i think of, and the only one I love faithfully.. Sigh... I'm broken.. So broken..

        I'd do anything for you.. When we were sick, we took care of each other. When we were hungry, we fed one another. When we're sad, we were there for each other. We're not perfect, but we were perfect for each other..  Now you don't need me anymore.. You're doing great on your own.. And I'm still miserable in this ditch.. I wish you could see.. I wish you'd open your eyes..

       You were the best thing that has ever happened to me.. You're my best friend.. You know everything there is to know about me.. Everything.. You taught me almost everything, but you never taught me how to live without you. Why did you gave me up... We sacrificed everything for one another.. Why give up halfway... We were just at the tip of our relationship.. We haven't even reach the best part..

       I know I'm expendable.. I'm replaceable.. We worked hard for each other.. We showed efforts to keep one anoher.. Wasn't that enough.. Fighting is a part of being in a relationship.. It's how you get to know each other even better.. I'm hot tempered, could barely control my anger.. I'm 24... It's my early adult stage.. Now I am at my worst.. And you've seen some of my best, but those are just minors.. I'm not perfect.. We coped with each others attitudes, thoughts and habits.. We accepted each other whole..

        And yes even 7 years of relationship could crumble, but that is just negative thinking.. Learn from those relationships.. We learn of each other every single day.. That's how relationships stay strong and firm.. They support one another.. Not chicken out half way... Yes i have issues, i might be lazy in your eyes.. But i have never thought negatively of you.. I only kept your positive sides.. Because you are a great person, as a friend and as a partner.. If only you knew how much you meant to me.. If you knew how real my affections towards you.. If only you knew that I was serious about us... You wouldn't have walked away, and still be here with me..

       I loved you, in all of your forms.. When you were at your best, and especially when you are at your worst.. When you're mad at me for the silliest reasons, when you screamed at me, when you said you hated me, when you say the harshest words possible.. It didn't even change the way I love you like i did for the last 2 years. Because i take you whole.. Everything about you.. I accepted all the goods and the bads..

     I wish you could do the same... I wish.. Now we're walking on different paths.. And I'm just glad you're happier now.. You deserve to be happy.. No more naggings from me, getting annoyed by my over protective attitude, no more hot tempers, no more infant jealousy..

       I'm sorry you had to go through this for 2 years, and it was all a waste of your time.. I'm sorry I couldn't be that perfect guy you've always wanted.. Sorry you had to put up with all my shenanigans.. I'm truly sorry..

       Live a happy life, don't think of me.. I'll be fine.. You do what you have to do. You know what's best for you.. You deserve the best. Because you're the best.

       Thank you for everything that you have given me.. I can never repay them.. You have my gratitude..

        And if one day we cross paths again, I swear I'll love you right. I'll ask for your hand in marriage. I'll never give up on you. I never have.

No matter what, in the near future if you're in trouble, or just need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. Always will be.

I love you, from the deepest part of my soul.

May he watch over you. Amin.